Monday, December 10, 2012

Matrimonial Monday!

Today I would like to address something that every wedding and every bride will encounter—advice.

I got engaged six months ago, and nearly every person I have encountered since has had some information to impart. Some of it is good and some of it is bad.

Here is some advice I have been given, and my insight on said advice:

1. It's YOUR day (bride and groom), so don't accommodate everyone else at your expense.
This is common advice, given by every former bride, future bride, and everyone in between. I struggle with this piece of advice as I tend to be a "peace maker" and someone who does not like to hurt others feelings. But, this advice is true. As Dan says "Twenty years from now, you and I will be the only ones who remember our wedding, so lets make it nice for us." Touché.

2. Things will go wrong.
This advice is also common. I take it to mean that you should be flexible and understanding. People will try to get their way ("My child is a wonderful angel, why can't they be at the wedding?"), and try as you might, you may have to succumb on certain issues. Kids at a wedding may or may not be one of them.

3. Only have who you want in your wedding party or on the guest list.
Yet another thing I am struggling with. Dan and I have always wanted a small wedding party and guest list. With each added soul comes more complication. So while not inviting someone to be part of the wedding party or guest list may be awkward, I think this is one of the most fundamental rights of the bride and groom. It doesn't mean you don't adore that person, it just means you are trying to keep it simple—the key to a stress free wedding.

4. Ask for help.
This advice is standard for almost any situation, but it is advice that in many cases I don't employ. In the case of a wedding, your bridesmaids and maid of honors (I couldn't choose between them!) are there to help you and share in celebrating your impending nuptials. When they except their role, they are excepting a certain responsibility. I can promise all of my girls that they will not be expected to bend over backwards for me or the wedding, but the reason I chose each girl is that she brings a special touch to what she does.

5. Have fun and be happy.
Wedding planning can be stressful, time consuming, and exhausting. But if all goes to plan, it is a once in a lifetime event, so everything leading up to the big day should be as enjoyable as possible. Try not to let the haters or the insignificant details getcha down!

Now that I have interpreted some of the advice I have gotten, it's time to give my own. 

Do what you want. I think this advice covers all the advice above, plus much more. If you want a one bridesmaid, have one bridesmaid. If you don't want kids at your wedding, don't have kids at your wedding. If you want cheese burgers and fries to be the cuisine of choice at your wedding, then hire In-N-Out. It's as easy as that!

Til next time. 

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